Dementia Has Moved In With Us

For over 20 years he delivered mail and knew hundreds of addresses and the names of every patron on his route. He loved delivering the mail and helping his patrons.

Today he will look at a picture of a family member and tell you he knows their face but does not know their name or who they are. He enjoyed checking the mailbox every day after he retired, but now he forgets to.

He has three or four sets of tools and has used some of them on a job he had years ago. He has used all of them around the house and working on vehicles. Today he does not know where his tools are or even what a screwdriver is. The tools are where they have been for over 40 years.

For years I could ask him if he would bring me something or help me with what I was doing, he was always there doing whatever I asked him to do eager and happy to do so.

Today I asked him if he would hand me a bowl that was on the stove. He stood in the middle of the room looking around like he was lost and said to me…”Where is the stove, what’s a stove?”

The man who loved life, going many places, bowling and playing tennis now watches TV 18 hours a day and does not want to even go out in the yard.

Dementia has moved in with us and although unwelcome there is nothing we can do about it…so I will be devoted to my Shug and caring for him. I will stand by him through it all.

He is in no pain and he seems happy in his new world. He smiles, laughs and acts as though nothing has changed. But things have changed and they have changed a lot.

I am so thankful he is in no pain and is happy. I hope and pray he can stay happy and pain free on this new journey we are now walking together.

With the Lord’s guidance and the prayers, encouragement, help and support from wonderful, loving family members and my sweet blogging friends…we are going to be just fine…I just know we will be.

All the years he lived with dementia he was never in pain and we were doing okay until he began falling. He didn’t live long after his last two falls. The doctor said he had a stroke or a heart attack he could not say for sure without an autopsy. He had a few light strokes over the years and I believe he had a big one and that is what took him.


His memorial page 

14 thoughts on “Dementia Has Moved In With Us”

  1. Hello, dear Mags. Mandy, here. It’s been a long time since I blogged, and now, I’m so glad I found you. I remember the pieces you wrote back when your true love began getting ill, and I grew to love you both as you told stories about the two of you taking in foster children. Your support of me at the time I wrote about my childhood meant the world to me.
    This piece is so beautiful. I love the photo. Your strength and light continue to shine. ❤

    1. Sweet Mandy it has made my day to come here this morning and find comments from you. Yes, it has been a very long time and I too am glad you found my blog. It is wonderful to hear from you again but heart is broken to learn what all you have been and are going through. Love and hugs sweet Mandy.

  2. Oh Mags…the love in your words is so beautiful.
    My father died of complications from Alzheimer’s in 2011.
    The last time that I saw him, he did not remember me or the fact that he had 9 children. But he was very kind to me and, on some level deep down inside, I got the distinct impression that he still did ‘know.’
    I wrote about that last visit with my father and gave it the title–Love is stronger than Alzheimer’s. Love lives on.

    1. It is so sad when they do not remember loved ones. My Shug had gotten to where he would look at me at time and seem to wonder who I was. He did not remember some family members. I will go read what you wrote about your father. Thank you for sharing the link.

Thank you, it was so nice of you to take the time to visit and leave a comment. Hugs and blessings to all.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.